Wednesday, March 19, 2008

I know what you did last nite, Mummy!

Sneaky mummy. Mummy knows Stylo is my arch enemy. Stylo stole my daddy on all my birthdays and thats why I created Jimilo to fight back. If you understand good and evil, you will know that Stylo is like the Decepticons and Jimilo is like the Autobots. We may be smaller but we are pure of heart. And the Autobots will always win cause good always beats evil.

But what did mummy do? She sneaky sneaky went out while I was still at Ramlaa's house, having an innocent nap. When I came home I called "Mummy! Mummy!" and I went up the stairs. And then I saw it - mummys pretty dress and expensive shoes were gone, and there was makeup all thrown about on the bed, and I knew that Mummy had got dressed very quickly and sneakied out to Stylo, my archest ever enemy!! Boy was I mad!

First Daddy. Now Mummy. How many more will fall to the dark side?

Lucky I put a secret button spycam on her dress to see what was happening. I saw daddy there with many bags under his eyes. This is what happens when you are beginning to turn evil, just like the emperor in Star Wars. A few more days, and he will be shrivelled and white - meaning he has full evil power already. Luckily it is reversible by just spending a few days with someone pure of heart, like me. Once daddy gets back he will be normal again, so dont worry. I do say he looks very dapper in his suit though, and it makes me wanna be grown up and wear a suit to next years Jimilo.

I saw grand auntie Esther and grand auntie Claire who are tatas family friends. Im not really surprised they have fallen to the dark side, as they are very indian diva-ish. I dont blame them cause they dunno about Jimilo. I saw the pretty blue fairy there too looking very chic & dapper, and Auntie Marikoko who I actually never met before, and the scary fairy-uncle who wanted to breast feed me last time. Wow, alot of people at Stylo. Must be the nice food and colorful drinks.

I guess the fashion from BRITISH INDIA was pretty good too. I like the little indian boys wearing the cool turbans. There were many pretty and dapper clothes, but nothing in my size though. I like the Yasmin Ahmad lady cause she is pretty funny, but she looks like she can spank pretty hard so I wouldnt want her to be my nanny or anything. Its too bad theres no catalogue to take home or door gift or anything. People who come to Jimilo always get door gifts and a special flying kiss to remember the event.

I can see they spent alot of effort to make the afterparty look nice and there were even British India scented candles everywhere. Cute food in little glasses that I would want to play with and not eat. A big beer bar which Tata would like very much. It looks like mummy is having fun, I suppose.

Then someone spotted mummy and recognized her as an Autobot from the good side. They probably thought she was spying to steal ideas for Jimilo. Anyway, they threw a beer bottle down and one of the bottle sharp bits got mummy on the leg, and first blood was drawn. A duel was declared where mummy and the bottle thrower had to fight to the death. Unfortunately socialites are not interested in duels these days so nobody fought in the end. It ended up that the only victims were mummy's new-ish creamy faux-python wooden platform Aldo shoes which got yukky blood stains all over them.

Mummy rushed to the toilets to try to save them. A nice lady Datin Lena who apparently used to be a girl scout many centuries ago helped to wash the glass out and tie a scarf around her leg. I guess mummy was thankful but more worried about the shoes than her leg.

"Please. Save my Shoes," Mummy pleaded. "I love them like my own child." (hmmm..)

But nothing could be done to get the blood out. Mummy grieved, and Datin Lena escaped with her own shoes intact. That was the end of that, cause mummy went home soon after that tragic mishap. (The shoes, "Aldie," as mummy fondly calls them, were sadly put to rest this morning in a small casket. A short eulogy was given to conclude the ceremony).

So thats the end of my spycam report. I guess I can admit that Stylo is a nice event. It is too bad about mummys shoes. Dunno why so many people were dropping bottles. Mummy told me later that 3 times, glass was broken around her that night. The first 2 times she escaped unhurt and the third time was unlucky. I think if ever there was a random shooting in Malaysia, mummy would somehow get hit even if she was just staying at home. Thats what you get when you join the Decepticons.

So looks like I have a lot of work to do on Jimilo to bring it up to scratch to compete. First thing is I need more budget, so if anyone wants to hire me for anything, I charge 50 cents an hour. I can entertain you, play with you and sing you a song. Call me!

1 comment:

夏娃 said...

Dear Jimi,
Thats the result of mummy sneaking out without Auntie Eve. Get Auntie Eve to escort and spy your mummy next time.I charged RM50/hour.
With Love,
Auntie Eve