I Feel Pretty... Oh So Pretty...

Hello Everybody!

Err, just so you know, I'm currently sick again with a stomach virus. I'm throwing up and having died-rear all the time.. its like Im in that Exorcist movie. And I have fever too, which goes up and down and when its down im ok, but when its up I get delirious and babble nonsense and stuff and start laughing and arguing with myself. Mummy and Daddy thinks it may be that I have been eating bits from Achoo's kitty litter, and thats what made me sick. Mummy says I should stay away from dirty things, especially any poo poo from a cat. ERrrr, My TUMMY...it feels all yukky like there are wormies inside...

But anyway, I am feeling a bit happy today cause today I get to post up pretty pics of Me! Yes thats right! About 2 weeks ago, me and mummy and Poh Poh went to Atria Shopping Centre, and we saw there was a photo shoot for kiddies going on by IDEES Studio and they were having a promotion.

We were abit skeppy about IDEES studio, cause first of all their logo looked kinda crappy and second of all they were from Kepong, which is not really brimming with stylish and artistic kinda people. The photographer was a short dude with long hair and didnt speak much English. But mummy said, its quite a reasonable price and she doesnt have any nice photos of me and so mummy signed me up for it. I had to get into 2 costumes and stand in front of a screen with lots of lights and a big umbrella in front. Mummy and Poh Poh were bouncing around and doing silly things to get me to smile. It took about an hour to do the whole thing, and in the end this is what we got...


The first bunch of pics, I was in a cowboy costume. But they didnt have a cowboy hat so they put a piece of cloth on me. And i looked sorta like an indian instead. The thing I am holding is a water bottle. I dunno why, they took the gun away from me and gave me this instead. Maybe they are an anti-violence studio.

Look mummy, they turned me into a cartoon!

A close up.. This pic would have been cooler with a gun. You'll never catch me alive! I'll shoot myself in the face!!

Here, I do one of my famous naughty boy poses with my tongue sticking out. Look at my cute chubby arms. Hehe!

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The next costume I got into was a sailor suit. Ahh..The good old little boy in a sailor suit photo. Well, mummy thinks its cute.

This one of me and Barney is mummy's favourite. Its the only one where my hat stayed on.

This one, Mummy did a big cross eyed spastic look to get me to smile.

This one, the photographer farted out the song BaaBaa Black Sheep to get me to laugh.

This one, I am looking very thoughtful with Barney. This is Poh Poh's favourite.

This photo, Barney was attacking my shoulder and I was like, Ahhh Ahhh, and they took a photo and it turned out not bad.

Well, thats all, only 8 photos. I hope you like them! Mummy says Idees is not bad, though they kept charging for additional stuff and it didn't end up that cheap after all. But at least she got some pics of me smiling! She says next time she will get photos of Daddy and Her and Me together, and it will be classy and stylish like a Calvin Klein ad. Good idea, mummy! Mummy and Daddy can pose in singlets and Calvin Klein undies, and I will pose in my nappy!

Boring Old Mummy Pictures and Poh Poh's New Film Career

Its here. The evidence of Mummy traitor-ing around at Stylo. Auntie Elaine FINALLY downloaded them from her camera and mummy passed them to me to post up. Took long enough. The pictures are practically sepia-toned by now.

News flash, mummy, I dont think my fans are interested in pictures about you, ok. But anyway, since mummy got me a Virtual Pet Piggy Bank yesterday, I will do her a favour and post up just a few pics. I chose the ones where she doesnt look so traitor-y.

I think Uncle Kim looks really pretty in his pink shirt, and Auntie Elaine looks quite handsome in her black dress. Mummy on the other hand, looks a bit pregnant. The lady on the stage is a famous singer called Shafinazazaza and Auntie Elaine is a big fan, so she and mummy harassed the poor lady and forced her to take photos with them.

Theres more pics, but yeah yeah.... Im lazy to put them up since I'm not in any of them.

Sorry, fans. Sorry to bore you like this. I will try to make it better by putting some interesting-ish comments.

In this pic above, you can see that Auntie Elaine is roughly about my height. HAHAHA! Just Joking! Now I have to pray really hard that she doesnt read my blog and see this.

In this pic, well.. its just like the previous pic but someone has cut their legs off. You cant see, but at the bottom their legs are spurting blood and stuff. Mummy and Auntie Elaine are in agony but have to smile and look pleasant for the sake of pretending to be glamorous for the paparats.

In this pic, Uncle Kim and Auntie Elaine look super ro mantic and glamorous. Uncle Kim's chest hair matches perfectly with Auntie Elaine's black dress, which means they have put abit of effort into co-ordinating their outfits.

In this pic, the Shafinazazaza lady has sort of nice titties.

This pic is of the Shafinazazaza lady singing. Her real legs are in the black dress behind. THe legs you see here are fake legs, hence they are super shiny. I think I will hire this Shafinazazaza lady for next years Jimilo. She might even do a duet with the Wiggles.

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And now, for more interesting and ground breaking news!! Poh Poh is now a film star. She recently got called by a talent agency to be in 2 commercials. In one, she acts as "Unobservant Woman". In the other, she is "Homeless Woman". I think they are both TV commercials.

Hmm.... Homeless and Unobservant..... well. I think its SUPER GLAM! I think Poh Poh looks like a very nice homeless woman! Even if her part is only 3 seconds. I am now issuing autographed copies of pics of me and poh poh for sale at 50 cents a piece. Write to me if you would like to order!!

Super Cool

Hello Friends! Today's blog is about the top things that I think are super cool. These are the super coolest things that Ive seen in the whole wide world since the 2 years Ive been alive. There are lots of cool things, but since I cant count past 10 I'll just put up a few (I forget how many). I hope you think its cool too!!


THE NO 1 COOLEST THING IN THE WORLD: DADDY ON THE GUITAR!!


Ok, in this pic he's not really shredding it, and you cant really see the guitar that well. But I can explain. This is because when daddy shreds the guitar his fingers are like lighting speed x 100 million, and no camera created by humankind can capture it. So all you will see is a blur, and maybe even the camera will explode from the excitement. As for the the super cool Mutagen Green Washburn Dimebag signature guitar, I can't capture it on camera either because of its super powers. When its in the case, it is just like an ordinary guitar. But in the hands of the Chosen One, its super powers get activated and it radiates super-awesomeness and any mortal who lays eyes on it will instantly turn into a pillar of salt. And THAT is why this is the no 1 coolest thing in the world.


The No 2 Coolest Thing in the World: JIMI ON THE GUITAR!!



Check out how super cool I look playing the guitar. Wow.

And this was when I was only, like, 1 year old. Mine is not a super cool Washburn yet, cause they dont make them small enough for me. But if they did, I would be totally ripping it. If I keep practising, I will be as good as daddy when I am 5 years old, and I will be the youngest Rock Star in the world. And that is why this is coolest thing no 2.


COOLEST THING IN THE WORLD NO 3: THIS AWESOME BABY!

This is one of the coolest babies ever! He lives in America. One morning he got up wanting milk, but his dumbass mother was asleep. Then he smelt smoke and saw burning hot flames in their low class American apartment that has no sprinklers. So he grabbed his mother and tied a pillow to her ass and threw her out the window to save her, and she landed on the pillow and survived. Then he put a rubber ball in his own nappy, and jumped out the window, and he landed on his ass and survived. This is a picture here that someone took of him jumping out the building. He is totally cool.

COOLEST THING IN THE WORLD NO 4: THIS BABY BREAKDANCER!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Aus7I7MhaOM

Ok, I dont know how to put the video on my blog. But heres the link to this Awesome cool baby! He can breakdance really good and hes only like 2 plus years old. I guess some of you may have seen this on youtube before, but you dunno how to appreciate it. Let me explain that as a baby, it is very very difficult to do some of the moves this kid did, ok. I have tried it and all I managed to do was turn myself into a upside down "U". So this kid is like, some kind of genius and maybe next week I will write to him and make him my best friend.



COOLEST THING IN THE WORLD NO 5: AWESOME BABY STUFF!





Normally I dont care about baby stuff cause I just leave it to my mum to buy whatever. But these things I found are really really awesome, dont you agree? I dont even know what they are, but I know if I had one, I would be super cool and all mummies, daddies and babies will be jealous of me. And that is how you can tell something is really Uber Cool: When Nobody knows what is really does, but Everybody Wants It! Like that stupid IPhone that Daddy wants Mummy to buy. What the hell is so special about it? It dont even have no buttons!! But somehow everybody wants it. Whatever.


Anyway you can find all this cool baby stuff in http://www.thecoolhunter.net/

This is not my whole list of course. Other cool stuff i like include:

- Ice Cream on those sticks
- Sour drinks
- Coke
- Predators
- Transformers
- Super high platform shoes


But today Im too busy to blog about any more, I have a schedule you know!! Its almost 6pm, and according to my schedule that means time to throw Achoo down the stairs. 7.30pm is when mummy comes home, so have to be good a bit.

So bye bye everybody, till next time then!!


PS> I wanna say that the other day, Auntie Eve and Uncle Y came by to take me and mummy to .......... ITALIANNIES!!! I got me a balloon and some ice cream. But mummy said I was badly behaved and I should apologise. .....Sorry Everybody, Im sorry I was a bad boy.... I will try harder next time. And oh, Auntie Eve gave us some Big Apple Donuts which are also going to be on my list of super cool things. Too bad Daddy ate them ALL and mummy got not a single one!! Bad daddy! Mummy says he will get constipation and serves him right.


Thanks Auntie Eve for the donuts!

Mr. Mom

Sorry everybody, I know I promised to put up pictures from my birthday ages ago. Im waiting for my slow coach mummy to get the pictures from Uncle Devan and Ive been waiting for like foooreeeeveerrr. I dunno how come they live in the same house but hardly have time to talk or exchange a couple-a pictures. I think Im the only one in the house who makes an effort to talk to everyone, including the pets and toys and furniture.

Hurry up mummy! You dont want to keep my fans waiting or they're going to lynch mob you! People want to see pictures of me to brighten up their day and you're screwing it up!

Mummy wastes alot of her time watching channel E! and forgets to do her mummy duties. I will have to ask daddy to discipline her whe he gets back from Singapore. (Hes there for Singapore Fashion Week.. dear me, I hope he doesnt come back all faggotty. Oops Im not supposed to know that word.)

In the meantime, please amuse yourself with this interesting article about.. MR MOM!!

Now you know i have an interest in cool mums and yuck mums (cause duh, im a baby) but this MOM is just plain wierd. This person used to be a woman but she took some pills and cut off some bits and so became a MAN. But she(He) forgot the very important bits and so he can still get pregnant just like a LADY!! And then, he's also married to another lady who has 2 kids. So now he is 6 mths pregnant with a little baby girl and got on OPRAH because he's the first man-mom in the whole wide world. Whoa, what a NEAT TRICK TO BECOME FAMOUS!!!

That makes me think.. if Daddy was the one who was pregnant with me, instead of mummy,
how would I be like?

Would I have a closer bond with daddy and he would be the one breastfeeding me and playing with me and getting up in the middle of the night to clean my poo poo?? I think that would be so wierd. And honestly, if my daddy used to be A GIRL, I think I would be a psycho baby right now and get ADHD before I turn 3 yrs old.

Mummy, on the other hand, says it would be so cool if daddy was pregnant with their next bub instead of her. She would be drooling with satisfaction at seeing daddy go through all the things she went through. She even gave me a list of all the things she would be so satisfied about:

- Daddy getting swollen ankles (and cankles)
- Daddy getting back pain
- Daddy walking like an indian penguin
- Daddy looking like a whale (here, she will make fun of daddy and call him Fatty Free Willy)
- Daddy with swollen titties which she will 'accidentally' knock around
- Daddy needing to pee every 10 mins, and sometimes peeing a little in his underwear
- Daddy getting craving for ice cream every 5 mins
- Daddy wearing a mumu dress which pregnant ladies wear

HAHAHA! I guess it would be funny, seeing daddy not being able to touch his toes. Well, hes only a few more burgers away anyway. Mummy and I will get popcorn and sit on the couch and laff at him until he cries and gets a hot flush. HAHA!

Well, thats all for now. I PROMISE I'll put up the birthday pics soon as mummy gets over her addiction to the Daily 10 and Giuliana Rancic (oh wait, she likes that Sal guy cause he looks abit like Predator from Aliens and Predators). Mummy really really likes predators and thinks they are the coolest.